Welcome. Been a minute since I was down in the furnace workshop. I mentioned that I queued the blog so that I could be present over the holidays, but I did not mention that I also queued the blog because three weeks ago, while I was having my coffee and watching the Today show and doing my morning check of the rescue where I got my lovely cat, there she was.
A burly little golden floof with dark, soulful eyes and a graceful black snoot. My heart, I realized, was suddenly racing. Oh no, I thought. Now? This is happening right now?
It was. Because I knew her when I saw her.
I knew right away she was my dog.
As you may have heard, I’ve been keeping an eye out for quite some time. For the cat, I was telling myself. The cat is obsessed with dogs, and I’m going to get her one.
She watches the dogs on their walks with fascination when she’s out front on the leash. All summer she was determined to approach them, until late last fall when the neighbor’s doodle enthusiastically reciprocated with wiggly, high-pitched dog friendliness .
The only other thing I’ve seen her hiss at was rain.
I’d been thinking it for some time, but suddenly there was a fire under me. Do it while she’s still young. This cat lives for her walks, she needs to be dog smart and it’s holding her back.
So I started looking. I installed the highly symbolic baby gate and I started meeting dogs. All the while in terror. I have never had a dog before.
The adoption was finalized on New Year’s Day and by the time I brought her home I had no more illusions, I got this dog for me. It feels like I imagined her into existence. She is not at all what I thought I was looking for, and that makes me all the more sure that she’s mine.
By the third day I stopped worrying over how big she’ll get. I stopped despairing over my spring travel plans (cancelled) and my free time (cancelled). I stopped worrying that my fragile new blogging ambition would collapse, that I wouldn’t have time to paint, that I was maybe actually ruining the beloved cat’s life. Because I’m making it work. I’m tired but I’m making it work.
I’ve been thinking it over so long it’s like she’s been here all along.
She turns those big dark eyes on me and it’s game over, man. Game over.
adventures 
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