Up in the pink room with the puppy today. We’ve been working on all kinds of things. I’ve sort of been working on next week’s blog posts but mostly I’ve been working on not losing my patience. I’ve started just walking out of the room when she tries to shred my clothing and that’s making a big difference in regards to my sanity at the very least.
Right now she’s snoring gently behind my chair so I’ll try and make the most of it.
The weather’s been deteriorating all day. Each time we’ve gone out for a bathroom break the air’s colder. It was sunny and freezing this morning but the sky’s clouded over now. It got so dark I had to check the clock.
Snow is falling, but not gently.
It’s the wind we’re looking out for these next few days.
The puppy is learning to settle at my feet while I work. She is learning to nap in her crate, to be still while I brush her, to get balm rubbed into her little foot pads before we go out on cold days. And these are the coldest of days — the coldest here in 7 years.
I played fireworks sounds and scattered kibble. Sang and scattered kibble. Went down to the basement and practiced my instrument. The first time she barked and barked. I texted my spouse:
You’re going to have to feed this dog hotdogs while I play the ukulele.
But by the third time she was silent.
I set up a little mobile version of my desk in the pink room and did some writing, picked some photos from my phone to draw for next week, called my family, breathed in the steam from cup after cup of tea while the puppy alternately snoozed and played and gnawed, and it occurred to me that even though these past few weeks have been some of the hardest of my life, I’ve tackled them as the best version of myself. There’s been no time for wasting.
No way to train this dog to be my ideal companion except to be my ideal self every day and show her where she fits. So that’s what I’m going to be doing this year.
It’s what I’ve been trying to do all along. But sometimes it’s easier to do things when you’re doing them for someone else.
adventures 
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